Level Up Your IELTS Essays: Moving from Band 7 to Band 8+ (Task 2)

​For IELTS Writing learners, one of the most effective ways to improve is by understanding why certain essays score higher than others. Simply practicing writing without guidance can help, but it often leaves students unsure about which elements truly make a difference in their band score. Comparing essays at different band levels is particularly helpful because it allows learners to see concrete differences in vocabulary, sentence structure, tone, and argument development.

By examining a Band 7 essay alongside a Band 8–9 essay, students can identify which features—such as more precise word choices, cohesive linking devices, and nuanced argumentation—are valued by IELTS examiners. This type of analysis not only clarifies what higher-scoring essays look like, but also gives learners practical strategies to elevate their own writing.
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In this article, we will compare two essays on the same topic—taxing unhealthy food—highlighting the differences between a Band 7 version using accessible vocabulary and a Band 8–9 version that demonstrates advanced academic writing skills. Through this comparison, learners can gain insight into how to transform a competent essay into a higher-scoring piece.

Question:
​Some people believe that governments should impose higher taxes on unhealthy food to encourage healthier eating habits. Others argue that individuals should have the freedom to choose what they eat. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Sample Essay (Band 7 / simpler vocabulary)

Some argue that taxing junk food more heavily is an effective way for governments to push people toward healthier choices. Others maintain that people should be free to select the foods they want. I agree with the second view because personal choice is very important.

People who support higher taxes say that making unhealthy food more expensive can help reduce health problems. Foods that have a lot of sugar, fat, or salt can cause obesity, heart problems, and diabetes. If these foods cost more, people might buy them less often and this could lead them to making better choices. Governments could also use the money from these taxes to pay for health programs or make healthy food cheaper.

However, I think people should be free to choose their food. ​Eating habits are personal and can be part of culture or family traditions. Making some foods more expensive goes against people’s right to choose. Putting taxes on unhealthy food could also be unfair, especially for people who don't earn a lot. It might not stop them from eating these foods, but only make it harder for them to afford other things. Teaching people about healthy food and giving them cheaper options is a better way to help them make good choices. 
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In conclusion, even though taxes on unhealthy food may help some people, I believe personal freedom is more important. Governments should focus on education and making healthy food easy to get, rather than forcing people to pay more for certain foods.

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​Sample Essay (Band 8+):
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Some hold the view that raising taxes on unhealthy products would discourage consumption and promote better diets. Another opinion is that dietary choices should remain a matter of personal freedom. Although taxing unhealthy food items may have certain benefits, I strongly support the view that individuals should have the right to decide what they consume.

Supporters of higher food taxes claim that such policies could improve public health. Unhealthy food, particularly those high in fat, sugar, and salt, is strongly linked to conditions such as obesity, diabetes, and heart disease. By raising the price of these items, governments could reduce consumption and promote healthier lifestyles. Moreover, the additional revenue could be used to fund public health initiatives or subsidize nutritious food options.
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Nevertheless, I believe the disadvantages of this approach outweigh the advantages. Firstly, food is a deeply personal matter, tied not only to health but also to culture, tradition, and individual preference. Imposing financial penalties on certain foods risks interfering with these personal freedoms. Secondly, higher taxes are likely to disproportionately affect people from lower-income groups, who may already struggle with the cost of living. Instead of reducing unhealthy consumption, such measures could create resentment and financial hardship. Finally, education and awareness campaigns are a more respectful and effective way to guide people toward healthier diets, as they allow individuals to make informed decisions without unnecessary restrictions.

In conclusion, while taxing unhealthy food may encourage some people to change their diets, it undermines personal freedom and risks unfairly burdening the poor. In my opinion, empowering individuals through education and access to affordable healthy food is a more just and sustainable solution.

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Here's a side-by-side comparison of each paragraph highlighting why the second essay has higher-level features and therefore a higher band score:

Introduction (Band 7)

Some argue that taxing junk food more heavily is an effective way for governments to push people toward healthier choices. 

Others maintain that people should be free to select the foods they want.

​I agree with the second view because personal choice is very important.

Introduction (Band 8+)

→ Some hold the view that raising taxes on unhealthy products would discourage consumption and promote better diets.

​→ Another opinion is that dietary choices should remain a matter of personal freedom.

​→​ Although taxing unhealthy food items may have certain benefits, I strongly support the view that individuals should have the right to decide what they consume.

Advanced features:

• More formal, precise vocabulary and phrasing: raising taxes, discourage consumption, dietary choices,  a matter of personal freedom, the right to decide.  
• Use of a complex sentence: The last sentence is a complex sentence because it contains one main clause ("I strongly support...") and one subordinate (dependent) clause. ("Although taxing unhealthy food items may have....")

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Body Paragraph 1 (Band 7)

People who support higher taxes say that making unhealthy food more expensive can help reduce health problems.

​Foods that have a lot of sugar, fat, or salt can cause obesity, heart problems, and diabetes.

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If these foods cost more, people might buy them less often and this could lead them to making better choices.

​Governments could also use the money from these taxes to pay for health programs or make healthy food cheaper.

Body Paragraph 1 (Band 8+)

​→​Supporters of higher food taxes claim that such policies could improve public health.


​​→​Unhealthy food, particularly those high in fat, sugar, and salt, is strongly linked to conditions such as obesity, diabetes, and heart disease.

​→​By raising the price of these items, governments could reduce consumption and promote healthier lifestyles.

​​→​Moreover, the additional revenue could be used to fund public health initiatives or subsidize nutritious food options.

Advanced features:

• Formal expressions: strongly linked to conditions, reduce consumption, promote healthier lifestyles, fund, public health initiatives, subsidize nutritious food
• More precise linking: Moreover
• Varied sentence structures, with more complex ideas expressed in one sentence

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Body Paragraph 2 (Band 7)

However, I think people should be free to choose their food.

​Eating habits are personal and can be part of culture or family traditions. Making some foods more expensive goes against people’s right to choose.



Putting taxes on unhealthy food could also be unfair, especially for people who don't earn a lot. 


It might not stop them from eating these foods, but only make it harder for them to afford other things.


​Teaching people about healthy food and giving them cheaper options is a better way to help them make good choices.

Body Paragraph 2 (Band 8+)

→​ Nevertheless, I believe the disadvantages of this approach outweigh the advantages.

→​ Firstly, food is a deeply personal matter, tied not only to health but also to culture, tradition, and individual preference. Imposing financial penalties on certain foods risks interfering with these personal freedoms.

→​ Secondly, higher taxes are likely to disproportionately affect people from lower-income groups, who may already struggle with the cost of living.

​→​ Instead of reducing unhealthy consumption, such measures could create resentment and financial hardship.

​→​ Finally, education and awareness campaigns are a more respectful and effective way to guide people toward healthier diets, as they allow individuals to make informed decisions without unnecessary restrictions.

​Advanced features:

• Complex linking: Nevertheless, firstly, secondly, finally
• Precise collocations: disproportionately affect, interfere with personal freedoms, financial hardship, informed decisions
• Multi-clause sentences
• Tone is more formal and analytical.

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Conclusion (Band 7)

In conclusion, even though taxes on unhealthy food may help some people, I believe personal freedom is more important.


​Governments should focus on education and making healthy food easy to get, rather than forcing people to pay more for certain foods.

Conclusion (Band 8+)

→​ In conclusion, while taxing unhealthy food may encourage some people to change their diets, it undermines personal freedom and risks unfairly burdening the poor.

​​→​ In my opinion, empowering individuals through education and access to affordable healthy food is a more just and sustainable solution.

Advanced features:

• Stronger word choice: undermines personal freedom, unfairly burdening, empowering individuals, a more just and sustainable solution
• Slightly longer sentences with nuance

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​Key Takeaways for Learners:

1. Vocabulary upgrade: Band 8–9 uses precise academic words and collocations instead of simple words (impose vs. charge, subsidize vs. make cheaper, undermines vs. makes unfair).
   
2. Linking and cohesion: Band 8–9 uses more formal linking devices (Nevertheless, Moreover, Finally) and structured sequencing.
   
3. Sentence complexity: Band 8–9 combines multiple ideas in one sentence using subordinate clauses, relative clauses, and participles.
   
4. Tone and stance: Band 8–9 maintains formal, academic, and persuasive tone, while Band 7 is simpler and more conversational but still organized.
   
5. Examples and reasoning: Both use examples, but Band 8–9 integrates them seamlessly and formally.
   

To wrap up, achieving a Band 8 in IELTS Writing Task 2 does not mean you have to use overly fancy or complicated words that might feel forced or unnatural. Instead, what really matters is using more advanced collocations and vocabulary that sound natural, precise, and slightly formal or academic. The key is to express your ideas clearly, link them logically, and maintain a confident yet authentic tone. By upgrading word choice, sentence variety, and cohesive devices thoughtfully—without overdoing it—you can elevate your essay from Band 7 to Band 8+ while still keeping it readable and examiner-friendly.